My impressions of Twilight so far.
Chapter one: Bella, honey, quit whining and get over yourself.
Chapter two: Edward disappears. Bella mopes, so nothing new there. Also, Forks sucks.
Chapter three: Bella is clumsy. Yes, we get that already! Can I join Team Tyler’s Van? Also, Forks sucks.
Chapter four: Bella’s been in town 2 (3?) weeks, and that Cullen kid is already telling her what to do. Does not bode well. Also, Forks sucks.
Chapter five: Bella is clumsy AND faints at the sight of blood. Oh, this relationship will last. Also, Forks sucks, but not as bad.
Now I think I shall go gorge myself on some “Angel” episodes in order to get the taste of faux vampire out of my mouth.