I don’t usually write reviews for things. For one, I’m not very good at it. Most of the time my reaction to something is either, “Me like” or “Meh.” That said, after watching last night’s episode of “Doctor Who,” I can’t not write something. This is not going to be a review, per se, just some probably incoherent thoughts of a “Doctor Who” fangirl.
First, I’d like to preface this rambling by saying I was not a fan of series 5. I know, I know, that kind of crazy talk could get me killed at a sci-fi convention. But… I was still feeling bereft over David Tennant leaving. He was my Doctor, and he wasn’t in it anymore. Also, Donna. I really became invested in her character, and she couldn’t be in it anymore. I was put off by Matt Smith’s take on the Doctor after the first episode, and Amy bugged me to no end. She was too brass and sassy and headstrong. I know I could say the same thing of Donna, but Amy was not Donna. Amy was annoying.
Each week, I’d come away from series 5 thinking to myself, “Meh. OK story. Some funny lines. But just not the same.” It wasn’t until “Vincent and the Doctor” that I finally felt, OK, this is “Doctor Who.” The next week, it was “The Lodger,” and for the first time, I couldn’t wait for the next episode. The final two episodes were also really good, if a little non-sensical, because of the interaction between the Doctor and River Song. I had enjoyed seeing River again earlier in the season, but didn’t care much for the storyline she was in. But as a season overall, it was definitely my least favorite.
So I wasn’t looking forward to season 6 as much as I should have.
But then. But then….
Oh, “The Impossible Astronaut.” River Song. The Silence. Canton Everett Delaware III. Oh, and the Doctor dies in the first few minutes.
Hooked, line and sinker.
Just like season 6 of “Lost,” series 6 of “Doctor Who” is making me fall in love with the show all over again. The first four episodes of the new series have been absolutely stellar, and making me yearn for more of the overall series arc. Is Amy really pregnant? Who killed the Doctor? Who is River Song? Who the hell is that weird regenerating child? I need answers, dammit!
I’m not a member of the online “Doctor Who” fandom. I don’t visit forums. I don’t scour the Internets looking for spoilers. Hell, I rarely read “Doctor Who”-related articles unless it sounds interesting. So I really don’t have any idea what may happen in the next three episodes. But I’m so looking forward to them!
If you’re still reading this,
you deserve a damn medal I would now like to ramble incoherently about the last couple of episodes.
The Curse of the Black Spot
Yo ho ho! The Doctor on a pirate ship. Can it get any better? (Turns out, it can…) The first viewing, I loved this episode. It was funny. I liked the pirates. I liked the Siren. I even enjoyed Amy’s swashbuckling. It was enjoyable hour of television. On the second and third viewings, I started having some problems with it.
1. How did Avery’s son get on board the ship if he didn’t know it was a pirate ship.
2. The alien ship is parked in the same place as the pirate ship? Like an alternate universe? I thought that was supposed to be impossible.
3. Why didn’t Avery, Amy and the Doctor land in the sick bay, attached to alien beds, if they were injured and taken by the Siren?
4. Crap CPR. (Oh my god, they killed Rory! You bastards!)
5. Where the hell did the boatswain go? One minute he’s piling powder kegs against the door; the next, he’s on the alien ship. We never see the Siren zap him. How did he get over there? (This could possibly be explained by shitting editing for American TV. Otherwise, damn, that’s a hell of a continuity flub.)
Even with all these plot holes, I still very much enjoyed it, more than most of series 5. It had some great moments. “Ever meet Freud? Comfy sofa…” “Cuddle me, shipmate!” “‘Toby!’ ‘Rory!’ ‘The Tardis!'” Space pirates! And another appearance by creepy eye-patch lady! Yes. Good stuff.
The Doctor’s Wife
I must confess, when I saw how excited everyone was over this episode being written by Neil Gaiman, I wondered what the fuss was about. This is where I admit I’ve never read anything by Gaiman. Yes, I know. I should be flogged. When I saw the preview and learned of the episode title, I wasn’t really that excited for it. Junkyard planet. Frazzled-looking mystery woman. Meh. I figured this would be one of those episodes I probably wouldn’t watch again, like “The Idiot’s Lantern.”
Oh, how I was wrong.
I went into the episode with some trepidation. Who the hell was this woman who was supposedly the Doctor’s “wife”? At first I figured it would be something the Doctor accidentally fell into, sort of how Malcolm Reynolds “accidentally” married Saffron in “Firefly.” Nope. Not even close.
Allow me to illustrate my reaction to the first few minutes of the show:
There was so, so much about this episode to love! Allow me to make another list:
1. THE DOCTOR’S WIFE IS THE TARDIS!
2. There’s an Ood!
3. She calls him “My thief!”
4. The Doctor: Ooh, sorry, do you have a name?
Idris/The Tardis: 700 years, finally he asks.
The Doctor: But what do I call you?
Idris/The Tardis: I think you call me…Sexy.
The Doctor: Only when we’re alone!
5. “Biting is like kissing, only there’s a winner.”
6. Time Lords changing gender is CANON, bitches!
7. The Doctor: She’s a woman and she’s the Tardis.
Amy: Did you wish really hard?
8. “I wanted to see the universe, so I stole a Time Lord and I ran away. And you were the only one mad enough.”
9. Tardis corridors! TEN’S CONSOLE!
10. Rory “dies.” AGAIN.
11. Idris/Tardis: There’s something I didn’t get to say to you.
The Doctor: Goodbye?
Idris/Tardis: No, I just wanted to say… hello. Hello, Doctor. It’s so very, very nice to meet you.
12. “The only water in the forest is the river.”
Oh my god! How can so much deliciousness fit into one 45-minute episode? I don’t… I can’t even…
*deep, calming breath*
OK. So. Now for some speculation that will probably be proven totally wrong. It’s funny. I usually have a knack for figuring out plots in books and TV shows. (Totally called the last Harry Potter book.) But with “Doctor Who,” all bets are totally off.
“The only water in the forest is the river.”
This seems to have something to do with River Song. But it’s almost too obvious. But let’s say it is. Who is River? Is she the Doctor’s real wife? Who did she kill? The Doctor? Someone else? Who? I don’t even know. But it’s odd, some of these word choices. The first time we met River Song was in “Silence in the Library.” The big bad in the first two episodes was called “The Silence.” Hmmm. “Silence in the Library” was a two-parter, with the second one called “Forest of the Dead.” “The only water in the forest is the river.” HMMMM…
Could River be Amy’s maybe-possible daughter? She did say the Doctor came into her life knowing everything about her, but that may just be because they meet back-to-font. She does know how to pilot that Tardis. But then there’s that creepy eye-patch lady Amy keeps seeing. She’s said two lines. The first, “No, I think she’s just dreaming,” and the second, seemingly to Amy directly, “It’s fine. You’re doing fine. Just stay calm.” Then she disappears.
Donna Noble had all kinds of alternate universes popping up around her, and now it’s as if the same thing is happening to Amy. There was the alternate universe where there were no stars; the one where Amy never met the Doctor; the alternate universe alien ship; the bubble universe where the Tardis became human. Is the eye-patch lady some kind of cosmic midwife for Amy’s child, who could very well be affected by being conceived in the Tardis and traveling through space/time? Is Amy living all of this in an alternate reality? I really hope that’s a red herring, because it seems so over-done, to have everything be a dream-sequence.
I feel like we’ve been given a bunch of clues we’ve not caught onto yet. Everything so far this season seems to be related in some way. For example, the Time Lord message the Doctor received was from the Corsair. A corsair is a pirate. They were just on a pirate ship. Maybe it’s just a big coincidence.
And what really makes Amy so special? It can’t be just because of the crack in her wall, not after everything we’ve seen. The Silence said she was needed. She may or may not be pregnant. Hell, for all we know, maybe Amy is the real Prisoner Zero. MOFFAT! STOP FUCKING WITH MY HEAD!
And finally (are you still reading this?) who is the regenerating little girl? River? Amy? Amy’s daughter? The daughter of the Master and his wife, as some have speculated? I have decided on my own theory:
(Feel free to leave your theories in the comments. Just because I don’t go looking for them doesn’t mean I don’t want to hear anyone else’s theories!)